For those who don’t know me, my name is Sarah McMahon, I mean Sarah Ouimet (still getting used to my married name). I recently married one of my best friends, Matt. I’ve been thinking about my relationship, how we first started dating in college and comparing it to experiences myself and others had navigating the social scene on campus.

In college, there was a prevalent hook-up culture that revolved around drinking. It ranged from kissing to having sex with acquaintances rather than within a committed relationship. The next day, friends would say that they had fun with someone they just met the night before, but often that excitement or ego boost would quickly fade, leaving them feeling disconnected and lonely. It didn’t offer the ability to connect with anyone on a meaningful level.

To avoid these hiccups with your hookups, I challenge you to step out of your comfort zone and get to know someone on a good, ol’ fashioned thing called a date. Is there someone you have met that you would like to know more about? Do you have that friend who you always thought could be the Cory to your Topanga?

But Wait! Here are some rules:

• Ask that person out IN PERSON. Okay, a phone call works too, but definitely not a text. This takes courage, so pump yourself up and ask! If they say no, that’s okay, regroup and try again with someone else.

• Matt and I had been friends for three years (we met the first weekend of freshmen year). One night, we were pretty shamelessly flirting with each other. We both were not interested in anything casual, but also didn’t want to jump into anything too fast and risk our longtime friendship. Instead, he asked (okay, I told him to ask me) on a date.

• If you ask someone out, my rule is you plan and pay for the date.

• Matt took me out to dinner at a Thai restaurant pretty close to campus. We sat between a fish tank and a gossiping group of fifty-year-old women. So, in other words, awesome.

• No alcohol or physical interactions during the date (other than maybe a hug) and the date should be anywhere between 45-90 minutes.

• Okay, Matt and I did hold hands after our dinner and yes, it was pretty awkward.

• Remember, these first few dates are a chance for you to do some recon and gather information—you may not know if you like the person romantically or not yet. Maybe at the end of the night, you’ll realize you just want to be friends.

• If steps 1-4 go well, go for a second round!
  • I asked Matt out for a second date to go bowling, and yes, I paid (even though he didn’t let me win).

About Student Life Spotlight

Over the new few weeks, a different staff member in Student Life will share a piece of themselves with you. They’ll reflect on what’s important to them, and what they believe will help you to make the most of your time at Texas Wesleyan.

No, they won’t be simply pitching their programs and services at you under the guise of a cleverly crafted article, but rather, digging deep to identify what has been most transformative about their experiences in life thus far, and passing that wisdom as best they can on to you.